How not to exorcize

Okay, so here’s the deal:Imagine you’re a good saint-praying 49-year old Roman Catholic Hispanic man with a 19-year old daughter who has her own three-year old daughter. You have an icon of Jesus and his mother on the front of your cinder-block home, so you know you’ve made it. For whatever reason, you suspect that your three-year old granddaughter is possessed by a demon. Your solution? Well; you can figure out the answer for yourself, but if your name is Ronald Marquez of Phoenix Arizona, described by neighbours as a “real gentle soul,” what follows is what you would have done:

You push a bed up against a door so no one can come in while your 19-year old daughter (the mother of the ‘possessed’ child) gets naked, holds a religious icon and starts chanting some bullshit as you attempt to choke the ‘demons’ out of your 3-year old descendent.

By the time police arrived last Saturday (alerted by the only sane member of the family apparently), this is the scene that greeted them when they entered the house. Oh; and both generations of Marquez’s daughters were covered in blood. Well, after a struggle attempting to get into the room, police tazered Marquez who later died (good riddance). Miraculously, the daughter lived. She might be able to trust Christians later on in life, after much counselling, but if she never did I wouldn’t blame her.

If any type of exorcism should have gone on, it ought to have been performed upon Ron. This is serious stuff folks. Semper Reformada.

~ by Tyler on July 31, 2007.